For Expat Women: A Resource that Addresses Every Aspect of A Woman's Life Abroad

There is a new book out that is a must read for every expat women: Expat Women: Confessions - 50 Answers to your Real-Life Questions about Living Abroad. It covers practically every aspect of an expat woman's life abroad: settling in, career, raising children, relationships, dealing with the emotional side of things and repatriation.

The co-authors Andrea Martins, founder of Expatwomen.com and Victoria Hepworth, founder of Lifelineshanghai.com worked to create this tremendous resource over a 3 year period. They were supported on their journey by two pioneers and pillars of the expatriate support community - Robin Pascoe, renowned author and international speaker on numerous issues facing expats, and Jo Parfitt, author and a pioneer in addressing the issues of accompanying spouses’ and aspiring writers.

With more support from other expat women from around the globe, it's no surprise this book is not only well-written, but the only one of its kind when it comes to solid and comprehensive advice and wisdom critical to any woman struggling with the challenges of living abroad.

But it's not just the content that makes it such a useful book. It's how the book is organized.

Each chapter begins with a story related to a particular issue - a story with which every woman who has faced that particular issue can relate. Then it goes on to address the issue with more than just a list of "top tips". It's solid advice supported with probing questions and well-informed suggestions.

One of the co-authors and a colleague I deeply respect for her tremendous contributions to the expat women worldwide, Andrea Martins agreed to answer a few questions for those interested in learning a bit more about the book.

• Andrea, can you tell us a little about yourself and your experience as an expat woman?

My expat experience started with my husband’s posting to Jakarta, Indonesia. It got off to a very rocky start. Having given up my career and then limited by a lack of transport, in the beginning people were literally walking away from me at social functions because I had no business card. All of the things that help define us and give us confidence at home were gone. But I did go on to work in a few different roles in Jakarta in those three years before moving to Mexico.

Our four years in Mexico were, overall, fabulous. But not in the early days, when I had arrived with a newborn and could not speak Spanish. I am a proactive, positive person and in both countries I was fortunate to meet some wonderful people very early on. But in both places I still struggled with various aspects of the transition process. The best thing about Mexico was that it was close to the United States – which meant I could travel to some great conferences in the U.S. and keep my mind active – which I highly recommend.

After Mexico, we repatriated for two and a half years to a beachside town that we had never lived in before. Again, we fell into a group of fantastic people, but the transition home was hard. Our beautiful seaside area lacked the diversity of nationalities that we had become familiar with abroad. For this and other reasons, it lacked the stimulation of a big city. Another lesson learned.

Now we have been in Kuala Lumpur, Malaysia, for nearly two years. KL is the easiest international city I have lived in so far. That said, it is not easy for everyone. I watch and listen to my friends around me and realize there are still many women here who are having a difficult time adapting to their new environment - and in many cases the loss of their career and identity.

• What inspired you to write this book?

What first inspired the writing of this book was the popularity of our Expat Confessions column online. Stories like April Davidson’s (featured in the book’s introduction) were much like the stories I heard from hundreds of women over the last four and a half years struggling with the challenges of living overseas all alone. Part of the purpose of this book was to use the power of knowing you are not alone to help expat women face and overcome the challenges of living and working abroad.

Ultimately it was the continual pushing and prompting of our dear friend and mentor, Robin Pascoe, to capture these Expat Confessions Q&A’s into a book that made it happen. She kept insisting that over years of her international speaking and travels she’s seen so many women out there that could really benefit from a book that we simply had to do it. Eventually, I just gave in and said “okay”!

• Having heard thousands of women's stories of their struggles from around the world, can you share one or two that have touched you or moved you most?

To this day, April Davidson’s story (from 2006) still moves me the most. Her story is not unique – but it was my first ‘aha’ moment with this topic. Her story encapsulates everything that I have seen in nearly every other similar story since.

To summarize, in mid-2005 April Davidson’s world was turned upside down following her husband’s job transfer to Mexico City. With two young children in tow, little Spanish, and none of the expat support infrastructure enjoyed by families of larger companies, April’s first six months in Mexico were a nightmare. She smiled on the outside but struggled on the inside. She could not understand what was happening to her and she started taking medication for anxiety and unexplained stomach problems. When April read one of Robin Pascoe’s books and returned it to me with tears in her eyes, telling me what a relief it was to finally know that she was not the only one struggling abroad, that was a moment I will never forget. It made me really think, “How many Aprils are there out there?” I’ve since learned that there are many.

When I think of other specific stories, I think of expatwomen.com website testimonials like “this has been a real life saver,” “the answer to my prayers,” “addictive,” and a real “spirit-lifter”. I can only imagine how much relief women like those must have felt to realize that they are not alone in their struggles – and to read about all the inspiring women who have overcome their struggles and reinvented their lives and careers abroad.

It worries me when I bring up this topic and I hear peers like Robin say that “Many women feel they are somehow letting their spouse and family down by not knowing everything there is to know about living and loving globally. Consequently, many expats simply do not want to question or speak up about the challenges of international relocation. So they slap a smile on their face that may remain frozen there for years!”

• What do you think are the three most important things that this book provides to expat women worldwide?

I genuinely hope that it leaves readers with:

1. An assurance that they are not alone – many expats struggle with aspects of the transition process – and many are still struggling;

2. Encouragement to take responsibility for turning their lives around if they have going through tough patches; and

3. Inspiration to keep brainstorming ideas for how they can get through any current struggles and to reinvent their lives.

• Where can someone go to get the book and other resources you've created for expat women?

To start, I invite your readers to download a free sample from our website here.

To buy the book, please visit any Amazon site (except Italy, for some unknown reason) and find it in the Kindle store. In the coming weeks, it will be downloadable for iPads as well.

Any bookstore that orders from major catalogues (like Ingram, Baker & Taylor, Barnes & Noble, Bertrams, Blackwell and many more) should also be able to order for you as well.

For bulk (customized) orders, please drop me a line and I’d be happy to help!

All of the resources on our website are free, so just jump onto ExpatWomen.com and start reading the interviews with successful expatriate women, motivational articles about living and working abroad, expat women blog listings, readers’ stories, expat club listings and more.

Many thanks again to Andrea for her continued support of expatriate women around the world!

My pleasure! Thanks for always being such a great supporter of expatriates rebuilding their lives abroad, Megan!

WIN A FREE COPY OF EXPAT CONFESSIONS!

Are you an expat women who has overcome obstacles to build a career or business to support your life abroad?

If so, send a 500 word version of your story and your top 3 lessons learned via my website by the 15th of June.

The top story will will a free copy of Expat Women: Confessions - 50 Answers to your Real-Life Questions about Living Abroad and I'll share your story here on my blog.

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Comments

Thank you very, very much Megan. You've always been a great supporter for many of us in the online expat niche and I genuinely appreciate your help in spreading-the-word about our new book! Warmest wishes, Andrea. :)

Posted by: Andrea Martins | May 2011 at 13:22